Seriously today was a conundrum… or yesterday as it’s after midnight. Either way I am very confused. I loved being in the classroom today and getting 60 seconds to introduce myself to the class… and at the same time I REALLY missed the girls. While my co-op teacher had the students fill out info sheets I looked out the window of the classroom longingly, wishing I was outside with my girls on a playdate, or walking in the park. I worried about Eleanor (justly as she had a very hard time). I am nervous about how Dorothy will be in preschool and do without me part-time.
I have always given props to those working mothers out there, it’s not easy and I know it. I’ve done it once. I didn’t expect to get the same emotional wave this time since I have already done it once, after Dorothy was born. Maybe it will be easier when Ellie does better without me? I really want to have a career in teaching one day (relatively soon?) but at the same time I do miss being a stay at home mom with my girls.